Merry Christmas from the Schoens!!! It is the time of year where families come together and share in the delights of the season, and friendships are rekindled and cherished. This has been a very blessed year for our family, so once again we bring you news and good tidings from our little corner of Nebraska!
The beginning of 2007 was a wonderful start to a very happy year. Jessica was dumped by her seemingly wonderful boyfriend, and was re-committed to "The Loony Bin," AKA Mom's basement. There, she spent many a wonderful evening being screamed at by her loving sister Jamie, and slept in a guest couch covered in cat urine. Jamie made many new friends whose main focus in life was body shots. She took a tour of the detox facility, finding it to be a very suitable accommodation. She also started a new career at the unemployment office, although she feels she may be on the wrong side of the counter. John continued to not talk to anybody. Ron and Ann continued to stew in a mutual hatred that had lasted 12 years, although they made headway when their conversations started ending with the words "He/She is fucking crazy," instead of the usual "Fuck Him/Her."
As the cold, dark winter days gave way to the light of spring, The Schoen Family began to delight more and more of each other. Jessica and Jamie became the best of friends, spending much time together chatting. Although the word "chatting" could easily be substituted with the word "screaming," Jessica and Jamie have found a deep love for each other deep within their hearts. Although again, the word "love" could easily be substituted with the word "hatred." John continued to not talk to anybody, and Ron and Ann ceremoniously ended their conversations with the phrase "What a fucking nutcase."
After working many jobs that eventually ended in a case of "I hate everything, fuck that job," Jessica found a comfortable fit serving at Brewskys, and took up residence at her best friend's home. Jamie found out she was expecting and we are so excited to have an addition to the Schoen family! Jamie is as happy as can be, and it must be pointed out that any news you may have heard about "Jamie freaking out and screaming obscenities at Jessica and Ann repeatedly" is simply not true. Jamie is a sweet, loving person who only has love and best wishes for her mom and sister. She decided to tour the detox facility again, and has taken a vow not to drive her car for a year, out of respect for the environment. How selfless she is and we are all so proud of her! Jessica decided she missed her sister so much, she moved back into the basement. Her best friends were so sad to see her go, but helped her move out by putting all of her things in the front lawn for her. Jamie certainly couldn't have been happier to have her big sister back in the house. They certainly started "chatting" more, and even brought Ann into their loving conversations. Jessica very sadly had to let her employment at Brewskys terminate, but was very happy to live in her mom's basement while she found a new job and was very grateful she had Jamie and Ann to remind her of her accomplishments everyday. John continued to not talk to anybody, and Ron and Ann's conversations ended with "You handle it, they're your children."
Eventually, Jamie and Jessica had to part ways. Jamie once again helped Jessica move by putting all of her things in the yard. Jessica took a camping trip for a night, although she used her car as a tent. What an adventure! Jessica was so happy to have the opportunity to sleep under the stars one more time before it grew cold again. She decided to live at Ron's house while she saves up money for a move to Minneapolis. She'll be sad to go, and she wants everybody to know how much she will miss them! Especially her sister and her best friends. She'll hold them in her heart as the most caring and loving people she knows. She works at Nebraska Book Company, and feels this is the best job she's ever had! Jamie is due in May, and we all know she'll make an awesome mother. She's recently taken a vow not to leave the house, and started wearing a beautiful ankle bracelet as a mark of her solidarity to the her vow. John continues to not talk to anybody, and Ron and Ann end their conversations with "Go to Hell."
The Schoens hope this Christmas letter finds you well and in good health, and we pray that your family is as blessed as ours! Merry Christmas everybody!
Ron, Ann, Jessica, Jamie, and John.
Sunday, December 16, 2007
Monday, December 03, 2007
The Mirror
So okay, I wrote this 4 years ago and have never shared it with anybody. Probably because I sound like I'm a nut job crazy insane person. But, seeing as how I am suffering from a 3 month long writer's block, and I've always though this to be a fabulous allegory on finding one's self, I figured "what the fucking hell." So here you go, my crazy nut job piece.
Who is this person staring back at me in the mirror? I really think I know her, but lately, I just can’t get a grasp on who she is. I stare at her, wishing to touch her. But every time I try, my fingers touch glass. Cold and hard to the touch, is this who she is?
I stare into her eyes. They’re big, haunted eyes, eyes the color of jade. What’s behind them? What are her thoughts? Her eyes give no indication, they just stare back at me with a piercing look that makes me shiver. It’s so strong I have to look away.
I feel empty. Like a jigsaw puzzle that lost all the inside pieces. When the wind blows under this vast starry sky, it blows right through me. I feel lost. Every star in the sky looks the same, there’s no one star to single out and follow. How did I get here, so lost and so empty?
The girl in the mirror. She’s led me here, and now I’m lost. Why did she do that? What good could it possibly do her to leave me stranded like this? I look at her once again, but she just returns that cool, hard stare.
I feel mesmerized by her. She’s weaving a web around me that I’m powerless to stop. But her eyes…
I just want to look into her eyes…
The mirror has shattered. It’s tiny slivers and pieces are spread in the grass all around me.
I don’t know what to do.
I’m wandering around, leaving bloody footprints on the grass. The slivers of glass under my bare feet slice me as I walk.
The wind still blows through me.
I’m looking for pieces. I pick one up, study it. There’s her eye, still haunting me, piercing me in jade. I find another one. This time, it’s harder to tear myself from the eye’s steely gaze. Her eyes are in every piece I find, making me look harder, faster for the pieces of the girl in the mirror. A million eyes look back at me as I rush to put the pieces together.
My hands are cut, oozing blood on the shattered pieces of my mirror, yet I still work feverishly to put the jigsaw of eyes together.
Whole around the edges, empty in the middle…
A drop of my blood falls on the mirror’s piece, making the eye red. I stop and stare at it- the cold, clear jade is now a deep, disturbing red. Making the eye evil.
I shriek, and toss the red eye away.
Now my tears are mixing with my blood, making it harder to fit the pieces together.
Her eyes… are everywhere. With a look as hard and cold as the glass that holds them, each eye possesses me, makes me mad.
I’ve got to finish…
My head feels droopy, it’s hard to keep my eyes open, but I still work, cutting myself on each piece before I fit it into the puzzle. The grass is red, stained with the blood that’s pouring out of my hands and feet.
The last piece is gone.
The eyes look at me accusingly. I threw it away, the last piece of the puzzle that would make the girl in the mirror whole. I threw it, and it’s gone.
I collapse to the ground, exhausted and weeping at the eyes. But they pay no attention. Each eye begs me to look, and finally, I lift my head, bloody and tearstained to look.
The eyes are red.
Her eyes…
The wind has stopped blowing.
The mirror is almost finished, but there is one piece missing, right where the girl’s heart should be. The girl is back, whole and piercing me with those cold, jade eyes again.
Where can I find the last piece?
I sit, cross-legged on the grass, staring back at the girl, wondering what to fill the hole in the mirror with.
My hands and feet are dark red, stained with my own blood, but they feel so warm. Almost a tingly sensation- my hands and feet have bees swarming inside them.
The Earth is also red, a deep peaceful red.
What can I do to finish my mirror?
The girl in the mirror is mocking me. Her eyes are dancing, she knows I cannot finish.
I drop my head into my hands and weep.
My tears are warm, adding even more warmth to my hands- they now feel on fire. What a sensation- so much different from the coldness of the mirror.
I touch the empty spot in the mirror with my tear soaked hand, and the girl blinked.
She blinked, and for one moment, I was out of her penetrating stare. I touch it again. Another blink.
Her eyes are silent now, with every touch of my hand, they grow mute.
I think I know now…
I stand up, and pick up a clod of deep red Earth. I mix it with my tears until it is clay.
And I shape it, mold it, into a heart.
A warm, red heart.
The girl’s gaze is curious now, for the first time, I can look at her eyes and not feel trapped. I smile at her, then place the Earthen heart where the last piece should be.
It fits. Her cold jade eyes start to grow warmer, until they are the color of shiny emeralds-
And the girl smiled back.
Who is this girl staring back at me in the mirror?She’s me. And the wind has never felt so good on my face….
Who is this person staring back at me in the mirror? I really think I know her, but lately, I just can’t get a grasp on who she is. I stare at her, wishing to touch her. But every time I try, my fingers touch glass. Cold and hard to the touch, is this who she is?
I stare into her eyes. They’re big, haunted eyes, eyes the color of jade. What’s behind them? What are her thoughts? Her eyes give no indication, they just stare back at me with a piercing look that makes me shiver. It’s so strong I have to look away.
I feel empty. Like a jigsaw puzzle that lost all the inside pieces. When the wind blows under this vast starry sky, it blows right through me. I feel lost. Every star in the sky looks the same, there’s no one star to single out and follow. How did I get here, so lost and so empty?
The girl in the mirror. She’s led me here, and now I’m lost. Why did she do that? What good could it possibly do her to leave me stranded like this? I look at her once again, but she just returns that cool, hard stare.
I feel mesmerized by her. She’s weaving a web around me that I’m powerless to stop. But her eyes…
I just want to look into her eyes…
The mirror has shattered. It’s tiny slivers and pieces are spread in the grass all around me.
I don’t know what to do.
I’m wandering around, leaving bloody footprints on the grass. The slivers of glass under my bare feet slice me as I walk.
The wind still blows through me.
I’m looking for pieces. I pick one up, study it. There’s her eye, still haunting me, piercing me in jade. I find another one. This time, it’s harder to tear myself from the eye’s steely gaze. Her eyes are in every piece I find, making me look harder, faster for the pieces of the girl in the mirror. A million eyes look back at me as I rush to put the pieces together.
My hands are cut, oozing blood on the shattered pieces of my mirror, yet I still work feverishly to put the jigsaw of eyes together.
Whole around the edges, empty in the middle…
A drop of my blood falls on the mirror’s piece, making the eye red. I stop and stare at it- the cold, clear jade is now a deep, disturbing red. Making the eye evil.
I shriek, and toss the red eye away.
Now my tears are mixing with my blood, making it harder to fit the pieces together.
Her eyes… are everywhere. With a look as hard and cold as the glass that holds them, each eye possesses me, makes me mad.
I’ve got to finish…
My head feels droopy, it’s hard to keep my eyes open, but I still work, cutting myself on each piece before I fit it into the puzzle. The grass is red, stained with the blood that’s pouring out of my hands and feet.
The last piece is gone.
The eyes look at me accusingly. I threw it away, the last piece of the puzzle that would make the girl in the mirror whole. I threw it, and it’s gone.
I collapse to the ground, exhausted and weeping at the eyes. But they pay no attention. Each eye begs me to look, and finally, I lift my head, bloody and tearstained to look.
The eyes are red.
Her eyes…
The wind has stopped blowing.
The mirror is almost finished, but there is one piece missing, right where the girl’s heart should be. The girl is back, whole and piercing me with those cold, jade eyes again.
Where can I find the last piece?
I sit, cross-legged on the grass, staring back at the girl, wondering what to fill the hole in the mirror with.
My hands and feet are dark red, stained with my own blood, but they feel so warm. Almost a tingly sensation- my hands and feet have bees swarming inside them.
The Earth is also red, a deep peaceful red.
What can I do to finish my mirror?
The girl in the mirror is mocking me. Her eyes are dancing, she knows I cannot finish.
I drop my head into my hands and weep.
My tears are warm, adding even more warmth to my hands- they now feel on fire. What a sensation- so much different from the coldness of the mirror.
I touch the empty spot in the mirror with my tear soaked hand, and the girl blinked.
She blinked, and for one moment, I was out of her penetrating stare. I touch it again. Another blink.
Her eyes are silent now, with every touch of my hand, they grow mute.
I think I know now…
I stand up, and pick up a clod of deep red Earth. I mix it with my tears until it is clay.
And I shape it, mold it, into a heart.
A warm, red heart.
The girl’s gaze is curious now, for the first time, I can look at her eyes and not feel trapped. I smile at her, then place the Earthen heart where the last piece should be.
It fits. Her cold jade eyes start to grow warmer, until they are the color of shiny emeralds-
And the girl smiled back.
Who is this girl staring back at me in the mirror?She’s me. And the wind has never felt so good on my face….
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